Thursday, April 19, 2018

Feeling pretty and smelling like a rose!

Feeling naturally pretty after wetting my hair and rubbing coconut oil and glycerin in it, thoroughly massaging my scalpery reggiones, then putting some concentrated perfume oil (rose) on the ends, and cleaning my face with more of the coconut oil and glycerin mixture - a combination that has kept my locs moisturized and low- breakage for years! (Sorry for the run-on sentence!) :)

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Make yourself a beautiful day!

Cassendre Xavier

"renaissance negresse"

$15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-Winning musician, writer, and community cultural arts organizer.

Founder & Executive Director of the Black Women's Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002).

Official website: http://cassEndrExavier.wordpress.com


Saturday, April 7, 2018

"Express Yourself" Means Just That

"Express Yourself" doesn't mean "Express yourself according and in response to how many likes, retweets, accolades or other social approval you may receive." And it doesn't mean, "Express yourself only when it's safe and comfortable." It means, "Express yourself."

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Make yourself a beautiful day!

Cassendre Xavier

"renaissance negresse"

$15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-Winning musician, writer, and community cultural arts organizer.

Founder & Executive Director of the Black Women's Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002).

Official website: http://cassEndrExavier.wordpress.com


I just soaked another towel...

I love laughing after I cum. 
I love hearing my man friend stomp around downstairs, watching TV, enjoying himself. I love knowing the cats are napping, and that, having expelled my womanly fluids I have added to my youthfulness and longevity, as the Taoist have taught (women expel, via female ejaculation, and men retain, a la injaculation). The life, it is good! 


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Make yourself a beautiful day!

Cassendre Xavier

"renaissance negresse"

$15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-Winning musician, writer, and community cultural arts organizer.

Founder & Executive Director of the Black Women's Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002).

Official website: http://cassEndrExavier.wordpress.com


Thursday, April 5, 2018

Today I Soaked a Towel

This is yet another ode to the gracious powers of masturbation. (You know...the usual!)
So this afternoon I was watching a little porn and tiddling my diddle, in my daily action of self-pleasuration when I started fantasizing about real life past and possible future experiences in uber hot partnersex. Two fellows came to mind. I stopped watching the porn and looked up an email thread I had with one of them last year. I started getting very aroused thinking how easy it would be to contact him and schedule another get together. I started squirting like I haven't done in a long time, uninspired as I've been with life challenges and a supportive but not very compatible man friend. I recalled this fellow, and imagined he was lying at my yoni, worshiping it gently as I would have to instruct him in real life but as he did naturally and exquisitely in my fantasy.
 I thought of a new *boy I was considering and I got excited about that, and kept squirting thinking about him and what could be, and I thought about someone else I had spoken with recently whom I could have and still could hook up with. In my fantasies these men were all so close to the reality of my being with them erotically. 
 But then I came. As I lifted the now heavy bath towel, I laughed, enjoying the afterglow of my orgasm, and I marveled at home suddenly detached I was from any previous thoughts of desire for these men. 
 I was reminded once again of the value of masturbating to clarify one's mind, thoughts, and plans.
 Now, fully sated, I recalled the reasons I did not continue or begin relations with the men of my past.
 Masturbation keeps your proverbial head on straight. And yes, I can always go back and shag someone from my past if I want. But it will probably be if I haven't masturbated "on" the prospect first!

(*Under 40!)



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Make yourself a beautiful day!

Cassendre Xavier

"renaissance negresse"

$15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-Winning musician, writer, and community cultural arts organizer.

Founder & Executive Director of the Black Women's Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002).

Official website: http://cassEndrExavier.wordpress.com


Friday, March 23, 2018

Book Review: Energy and BDSM: Exploration of a Deeper Experience, by slave dragos

Reviewer: Cassendre Xavier (aka Amrita Waterfalls) 

***An excellent kinky beginner's guide and love story!**

[Energy and BDSM: Exploration of a Deeper Experience][https://www.amazon.com/ENERGY-BDSM-Exploration-Deeper-Experience-ebook/dp/B074Q3VJXM/ref=dp_kinw_strp_1?dpID=41D66-Ktq%252BL&preST=_SY445_QL70_&dpSrc=detail], by [slave dragos][https://fetlife.com/users/7450182] is a good book for a novice seeking both play and personal intimacy.

The author provides:
* A personal history written with heart, feeling, and compassion for other seekers.
* Helpful tips for safe, sane, and consensual play.
* Accurate advice for those seeking significant romantic relationships in the kink world, including advice on using dating websites and in-person fetish events.
* An engaging love story of how the author met his ideal counterpart, and what their relationship is like, both the kinky and vanilla .

I have been a writer, publisher, and editor for 28 years, produced, curated community cultural arts and literary events for 25 years, and judged written and spoken word poetry contests.
I've been in the BDSM/ fetish/kink scene for 25 years, and I am not a physical player as the author and his mate are, so this book was not relevant to me as a highly critical reader and different type of kinkster.
There are many changes I would make if I were proofreading and editing the book myself, and it lacks a sophistication that I had expected to match their presence in the BDSM/fetish scene (fabulous, glossy, professional photographs of their play, engaged activity and involvement with community groups, etc.). I was disappointed by that difference and by the lack of stimulation and challenge that I had expected in higher caliber writing.
But if I met a newbie who was looking for love and someone to beat the blank out of them for mutual pleasure, I would recommend Energy and BDSM!
Above all, it is a wonderful creative expression of the author and gift for his partner and our kinky community. Recommended!
(I recommend this book as:
* A beginner's guide to the BDSM/fetish community.
* A guide for dating in the BDSM/fetish world.
* A Valentine's Day present between kinksters.)



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Make yourself a beautiful day!

Cassendre Xavier

"renaissance negresse"

$15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-Winning musician, writer, and community cultural arts organizer.

Founder & Executive Director of the Black Women's Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002).

Official website: http://cassEndrExavier.wordpress.com


Saturday, February 10, 2018

With Pleasure: Can You Masturbate Without Porn?

I noticed the other day when I was preparing for my daily orgasm (for health, youthfulness, longevity and spiritual power!) that I had become dependent on watching amateur porn to get off.
 I was introduced to xhamster in 2009 when I met and began living with my late partner. He watched it, and a few other sites I never got into. I loved the amateur porn videos of real couples, saw for the first time "super size" and "mature"(older) women being admired and sexually desired. I learned a lot as a persun who previously had only seen glossy, paid actors and obviously unhappy straight women pretending to enjoy sex with other women and being splooged on by men. All the years of watching Barbie dolls in Lee Press-On nails, tiny white socks and high heel pumps were healed away by authentic, unscripted pleasure enjoyed, not performed, by people of different ages, races, body types and gender expressions.
 I used to be much more of a typical female masturbator, in that I would lie down and just use my imagination. Or I would read something erotic.
 But once I discovered xhamster, which got me to climax much more quickly (I realize now, when did it become a race or thing to hurry?), that became my new go-to. Even when it isn't that convenient, I will get my tablet and abscond to some dark and lonely corner (figuratively speaking) or bright ass bathroom to get the deed done.
 Recently I decided to start re-training my body and mind back to full self-sufficiency as relates to my self-pleasuring. I'm not addicted to porn, but I don't like feeling as if I need it to get off. 
  There are several additional motivators or benefits to weaning from erotic material-fueled masturbation: 

1)If you are "of a certain age" (female/pre/menopausal or male/prostate/erectile function) it gets you back in touch and in tune to your body's responses, one of the best ways to catch symptoms early and/or note things you may want to improve or treat.

2)If you are on any cardiovascular, hypertension, and/or psychiatric medications, these often have side effects that affect the netherreggiones, and you will be better able to notice and quickly address these without erotic stimulants during masturbation. 

3)You will slow down your schedule. Masturbating without porn takes more time.

4)You will reduce stress. Slowing down means doing less, and that means more relaxing. 

5)You will increase your self-esteem. Taking time for your life, whether to buy healthier foods, exercise more, or improve the quality of your orgasms, tells your brain and your heart that you matter, that you are worth the effort. You will feel better about yourself. 

6)Others will treat you better. We teach others how to treat us. Even if no one else can "see" the effort you're making, the self-care on the inside will register psychically on the exterior. Similar to nice underwear increasing one's confidence even though only the wearer knows, your refined masturbatory habits will attract more pleasant and harmonious interactions with others. As within, so without.

So, lettuce sea what transpires when we quiet down and tune in for self-pleasure. Let's try to climax sans video for a bit. It's for the greater good!


With pleasure, 

Amrita Waterfalls 
The Erotic Side of [CX][http://tinyurl.com/CXSpotify]



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Make yourself a beautiful day!

Cassendre Xavier

"renaissance negresse"

$15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-Winning musician, writer, and community cultural arts organizer.

Founder & Executive Director of the Black Women's Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002).

Official website: http://cassEndrExavier.wordpress.com


Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Microcosm of Life: FetLife & The Choice to Love It

FetLife is a microcosm of life to me in several ways. I think because it is a concentration of a small segment of the general population, I have intense experiences here. FetLife is "life concentrate" to me in some ways, probably also because I am an introvert and there is so much contact here.
 It seems to me I am being presented with a choice to actively love FetLife. It will and does disappoint, frustrate, and annoy me. It doesn't have "the (one) answer" and it won't fix all of my problems. Like people and like life itself, it just wants to be loved, consistently and with discernment and discipline when needed, but without rash or harsh judgment.
 I imagine if I choose to love FetLife or the community here, I will expand that love and dedication outward. I may find I am more loving, gentle, patient and forgiving with others, and with myself. 
 I don't know why I am the way I am or what FetLife will do for me but I do know there is a chance for good things to happen, if I let and help them be, instead of frighten them away.
 There is a lot of fear in me and I can choose other options. Perhaps this is a good place to learn and perhaps teach through sharing and encouragement. 

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My links:

MUSIC
* [Music downloads][http://cdbaby.com/all/cassendre]
* [Music "listening room"][http://cassendrexavier.bandcamp.com]

WRITING
* [Wisdom Magazine articles][http://tinyurl.com/CXWisdom]

YOUTUBE 

SOCIAL NETWORKING
 
FOR PATRONS & SUPPORTERS
* Checks and money orders may be mailed to a Philadelphia address (address and Payable To information available upon requestation). My Patrons become my pen pals, and I also welcome moneyless cards and letters of support and appreciation!

  To my patrons and supporters: I consider myself a multi-media healing artist, and I thank you for your continued support of my art/work, and therefore, life!





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Make yourself a beautiful day!

Cassendre Xavier

"renaissance negresse"

$15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-Winning musician, writer, and community cultural arts organizer.

Founder & Executive Director of the Black Women's Arts Festival (Est. 2003) and the Women's Writing & Spoken Word Series (Est. 2002).

Official website: http://cassEndrExavier.wordpress.com