Sunday, July 24, 2016

An Ass Perfect for Rimming

by Amrita Waterfalls

I enjoyed Myself last night with a new friend. At one point as he hopped up from the bed to go out of the room for a minute, he stopped to appreciate My ass as I was belly down resting from a recent series of medium sized orgasms (which happen when I'm squirting and pissing but aren't the "big O"). As he playfully kissed, licked, and prodded My asshole, he stopped and exclaimed, "Oh my god, your ass is great!" I asked him what he meant by that, as being smaller of booty and being a great admirer of large ones, I always like to know what is meant by a "great" ass when it's smaller!

I said, "Guys always like to rim Me, but I just figured I attract guys who are into rimming."

"No," he reiterated, "You have a fantastic ass."

I asked him to tell Me again, "Well, what makes it fantastic, what about it exactly."

"Well," he began, "I don't have to fight and force the cheeks open, I can get at it easily, and there's not a bunch of hair there."

I had no idea My, um, rather, modest padding was an ASS-et!

Knowing I'd be posting this, I asked him later to write more to Me about this. And here's what he wrote:

.

"You want me to qualify your ass in list form:


First is form:

It has a wonderful shape

It has a pleasing smoothness on your cheeks and in your crack

Your hole has a wonderful symmetry and lovely color

And it don't taste bad either

I can only make the analogy to a bottle of Mexican coca cola great hand feel nice sweetness and no high fructose corn syrup.

In retrospect I should have gotten some pics.

In the future I will call your anus cookie and make the appropriate cookie monster nom nom eating sounds"


I did no editing as his writing reflects the playful nature that added to My pleasure last night.


Thanks for listening. :)


© Copyright 2016 by Amrita Waterfalls (the sexy side of Cassendre Xavier aka Endowed Goddess). All rights reserved. Visit http://cassEndrExavier.com

Monday, July 4, 2016

With Pleasure, Erotic Museletter by Amrita Waterfalls (7/4/16)

With Pleasure, Erotic Museletter by Amrita Waterfalls


Monday, July 4, 2016


TABLE OF CONTENTS


1) WHO IS AMRITA WATERFALLS

2) EROTICA, PORN, OR PORNOGRAPHY?

3) BECOMING AN EROTIC ARTIST (FINDING YOUR VOICE, RELEASING FEAR, DOING YOUR WORK, CELEBRATING YOUR LIFE)

4) MENTAL ILLNESS, TRAUMA & SEXUALITY




CONTENTS OF TABLE



1) WHO IS AMRITA WATERFALLS

My birth, legal, and primary professional name is Cassendre Xavier. I consider myself a "multi-media healing artist," community cultural arts organizer and event producer, and am a recipient of a $15,000 award for my "work in art and social change". I create under several pseudonyms: Amrita Waterfalls (erotic writing and images), Amethyste Rah (spiritual guided meditation recordings), and Endowed Goddess (erotic videos and images). I have been a member of Philadelphia's LGBTQIP (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning, intersexed, polyamorous) as well as that city's leather/BDSM/kink communities since 1991. I am also a child sexual and physical abuse survivor with a lifelong eating disorder, Bipolar 2, and Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). I believe in sharing all of my life as a late bloomer with major challenges, and what has worked for me in my life that has been most joyful. The word "amrita" is Sanskrit for "nectar" or "ambrosia" and is known in Tantric and Taoist sexual practicing communities to have a special meaning I am too shy to write here but not too shy to write elsewhere nor show in my pics and videos! I also am a recently discovered Domme (or sexually Dominant Womon), with several years of experience training as a submissive in my early days of kink. Now that I've said that, you will understand why I will be using capital letters when discussing Myself.

My primary teachers and mentors in progressive sexuality have been:

Betty Dodson, Ph.D ("Mother of Masturbation", artist, sex educator, author)

Kamala Devi (Tantric author, coach, author, and workshop presenter)

Nina Hartley (Adult Entertainer, nurse, author, speaker)

Sharon Mitchell, Ph.D (Former Adult Entertainer, health advocate)

Annie Sprinkle, Ph.D (Adult Entertainer, author, artist)


I appreciate your being here as My audience and self-sexuality adventure partner. Welcome to My lair!


2) EROTICA, PORN, OR PORNOGRAPHY?

I was curious recently to know the difference between erotica and porn. I looked it up on the internets and found that both refer to sexually explicit material, but the latter is designed to illicit a physical, erotic response. I then decided that I am and always have been interested in the latter only, as I feel the former is a waste of time. Why would I wish to spend time looking at, listening to, or viewing sexually explicit material without My panties getting wet or My clit throbbing? No thanks! I believe this is why everything I write, or take pictures of, or video record, is a turn-on to Myself and those who view them. I'm not aware that My intention is always to do so, but I am pleased when I receive feedback that that was the result. (Although I've never been interested in "tributes" – wherein men ejaculate on an image of an object of their erotic affections, keyword there being "object", I do enjoy hearing from them that a writing, still or video image of Myself made them hard. I especially like when I hear that they then must, um, "take care" of their "special condition" shortly afterwards. This pleases Me greatly. I adore having this affect on people. What I don't adore is the word "pornography". While I consider Myself a feminist, and I dislike soooo much of what is now in the so-called "porn industry", the word pornography brings to My mind so much that is negative about erotically stimulating materials. All of this negativity added to My already significant guilt and shame over My erotic thoughts and feelings as a persun who was sexually abused growing up and also as a persun reared in a fundamentalist Christian home.

I also don't like the word "porn" insofar as what it brings to My mind: images of straight white men jacking off way too much to images that are totally fake and featuring wimmin whose sadness, hopelessness, and desperation are clearly visible in their eyes. I don't believe in that idea of "porn" either. Perhaps I'll have to create a word or phrase that means what I am doing with my erotic work, because I and My appreciative and expressive audience know that it is good.



3) BECOMING AN EROTIC ARTIST (FINDING YOUR VOICE, RELEASING FEAR, DOING YOUR WORK, CELEBRATING YOUR LIFE)

One of my favorite things to do is inspire and encourage others on My path. I believe that within anyone's immediate network, neighborhood, or community, are at least 15 people who identify with and/or want, and/or going through the same thing or something similar to what you are. So it's our job to, if called to, share what we're going through and what we've learned on our journey.

If you are interested in becoming an erotic artist (whatever that means to you), here are some issues you may run into, and that I have gone through, and dealt with.


Finding Your Voice: You won't know what your voice is until you begin to speak and practice speaking. That could be by writing, or by recording yourself via audio or video, or by your fine arts, as Betty Dodson did in the beginning. In the beginning she was a visual artist (as she still is) and had an erotic arts showing. That exhibit was the beginning of a lot for her, and her work continues to this day.

Most of us erotic artists found our way here out of a combination of needing to share our erotic journey, to build a community because we needed answers and we also wanted to share what we'd learned so as to help others through their difficulties in becoming joyful, healthy, fully self-actualized and self-expressive beings with physical bodies. That is our right. We are naturally creative, and like all humyns (except those who identify as non-masturbating asexual), we are sexual beings. So we blend the two along with our community building or activism work.

Begin to speak. One of my earliest angel readings informed Me that I was to use my "voice" and the reader told Me that meant not only to sing, but to speak, and also to write. I took that to heart and when I began releasing all of My fears, I realized it was time to finally come out of the erotic closet and begin sharing My truths and experiences.

I am finding My voice only through practice. I didn't start out with a firm idea of what I wanted to say or focus on exactly. But I knew I had ideas and that I felt passionate about them. I learned about style of delivery by looking at the erotic artists (many of them the mentors and teachers I mentioned in My bio above), and picked and chose from some of their styles what I wanted to emulate. I also drew from other mentors and teachers from my path of self-growth, including some of My primary spiritual teachers – who, not surprisingly are female authors who are also musicians and who also have a vast amount of guided meditation recordings. The fact that I am all of these things is absolutely no coincidence.

Know that you are guided on this path. Sexual energy is creative energy, one of the most powerful forces there is. It is 100% at your availability the instant you decide to take your first step.

You will not be alone. There are many of us on this path, and we are thrilled to have you along, because we know that your voice will reflect in the hearts of the many you are called to serve through your work.

Focus on making yourself happy. Many successful artists say "Please yourself first.
- SARK, or "Write what you want to read." –Toni Morrison. Don't try to fit into a mold. Be your own mold, and then break free from even that. Keep growing and allow change. As long as you stay joyful and please yourself through your work, it will resonate with your present and future audience.

Release fear. It has nothing to do with your work, except as providing a test for you to pass and become stronger and more effective as an erotic artist. Fear is your helper in that is a weight to help you kick ass and better serve your art and your audience. Anything else is harmful. Don't let it do that.

These tips should help you get started, and know that once you begin and try and enjoy and release fear, you'll be celebrating your life in full, in ways you hadn't expected and receive gifts you'd never expected.


4) MENTAL ILLNESS, TRAUMA & SEXUALITY

I think one of the greatest mistakes people with a mental health diagnosis do when it comes to having a wonderful and healthy erotic life is have low expectations.

When it comes to partnersex, we don't think we're "normal" or deserving enough to attract compatible or enjoyable partners.

Another mistake we make is not taking adequate care of our mental health. Either we're in denial, or we're ashamed, but we're just not diligent nor interested in addressing our mental health issues.

When it comes to trauma, we may be too hurt to even function let alone thrive, and this is in daily living and life skills, not even dealing with relationships or partnersex.

The only solution I've found in all three situations are increasing self-love and making self-care paramount.

Sometimes it takes a major crisis to bring us to a point where we realize this is a must.

In My case it took finally entering a homeless shelter after years of financial under-earning and dependence upon family, lovers, and friends. Although I was diagnosed in My early 20s and in occasional psychiatric care and/or on medication since since then, the denial that is typical of one with My condition (bipolar disorder – BPD) along with the shame I had of having "something wrong with My brain", kept Me from applying for disability when my first therapist suggested it, and from making other changes to My lifestyle that would have supported Me as the being I was, and allowed Me to live independently and healthfully as a persun with a totally manageable illness.

Often times, even when major crises bring us to this point, the healing and progress can be immense. When I entered shelter, I was then aligned with many social service agencies who are helping Me with My goals of receiving social security disability benefits and stable, affordable, subsidized housing. Am I ashamed of telling you these things? I won't lie – it's a little embarrassing. But am I proud of doing so? Absolutely! Because I know I'm not the only one, and in speaking about it I release your shame as well.

Like guilt, shame has absolutely no place in our minds, let alone our boudoirs.

When we can learn to take care of ourselves, first fully accepting our conditions, then we can not only live well with proper management, receiving support however we need it (because we love ourselves and believe ourselves to be worthy of receiving it – and also because we are no longer afraid nor ashamed, so we feel free to ask for such help), we can then also show the way to others on a similar path.


No matter what your condition, your soul was never wounded, and you are free, loving, and worthy of the kind of life you want – and that includes your ideal and self-chosen sex life. This is a worthy endeavor, not only for the good you will do yourself, but the good you will do for others in your life. I fully believe and exemplify that!


With Pleasure,


Amrita Waterfalls

The Erotic Side of Cassendre Xavier




Ⓒ 2016 by Cassendre Xavier (writing as Amrita Waterfalls). All rights reserved. http://amritawaterfalls.blogspot.com.

[Photo: "Green Satin Invitation" self-portrait by Cassendre Xavier]